The Goofiest (& Perhaps Best) Racing On Earth
Welcome To Sears Pointless

In my eight years of photographing and writing about cars here on Speedhunters, I’ve seen things that have generated all manner of emotional reactions. From the sheer thrill of drifting in the mountains above Hiroshima, to the insanity that is standing next to a nitro funny car as it launches down the quarter mile at Famoso.

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I’ve been frightened when out of control racing cars have come dangerously close to my trackside photo positions; I’ve stared at custom-built automobiles with my jaw open in amazement. But it wasn’t until last weekend at Sonoma Raceway that I was laughing out loud while looking through my viewfinder and clicking the shutter button.

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Sure, I’ve laughed in response to a gigantic turbocharger or a crazy story from a car owner, but what I was seeing here in Sonoma was pure automotive comedy – and I loved every minute of it. Welcome to the 24 Hours of LeMons.

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I’m guessing most of you guys are already familiar with this unique brand of amateur, extremely budget-minded endurance racing, so I’m not going to spend much time going over the background and rules of the series (that can all be found on the official LeMons website). But I will say that after spending just a few minutes watching the action, all I could think about was why I hadn’t covered the event earlier!

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I’ll get to the cars in a moment, but the first thing I noticed was the sheer number of them. While most race events usually have a pack of cars that you wait for, or small groups spread across the track, the ‘Sears Pointless’ event was a never-ending parade of vehicles looping their way around the hilly Sonoma track.

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With somewhere around 150 cars entered that’s not surprising. And given the fact that all the vehicles race at the same time rather than being divided into groups, it was pure chaos. When it comes to LeMons, that’s how it’s supposed to be.

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And that huge field of cars is about as diverse and wild as you can possibly imagine; the only real rules being that a LeMons entry must have four wheels, have been originally sold for street use, and cost no more than $500 to build (excluding the necessary safety equipment and other items like wheels and tires). It’s about ingenuity and reliability more than it’s about budget our outright speed.

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The idea is for everyone is to share and enjoy a cheap and cheerful amateur race series with tons of seat time and lots of wheel-to-wheel action, but from what I saw there are really two different sides to the LeMons experience.

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On one hand it’s a no-frills. low-budget race series with a lot of entries built out of popular track cars like the first generation Mazda Miata and the E30 chassis BMW. In other words, it’s a very affordable way to scratch the racing itch and have fun with your friends at the same time.

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And on the other hand, it’s the ultimate in automotive-related expression and outright humor. Thus you get entries like Ford Crown Victorias and Volkswagon Vanagons – vehicles that were never designed for track use, but fit right in among the LeMons crowd.

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Volvo, Mercedes-Benz, Ranchero, Mustang , Golf. Just look at this scene of the field pulling out of the main straight and tell me it doesn’t you make laugh in amazement (or disgust depending on your automotive sensibilities).

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And it’s not just the unusual base vehicles that make the series so strange and so entertaining, it’s the clever and often hilarious ways in which the cars are modified and decorated. The track is full of character-laden beaters like the PoorOlator Chevy Monza.

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While walking the pits at a normal race event will usually get reactions like, ‘Oh hey, that’s pretty cool’, browsing the paddock at LeMons is going be filled with lots of ‘WTF is that?’ moments.

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It’s the kind of pace where an Oldsmobile Cutlass covered in fur and wearing a horse’s head and tail is a completely normal and expected sight.

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As is a Ford Crown Vic with the word ‘ASSCAR’ across the door and a pair of mannequin legs sticking straight up from the trunk.

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Why Volkswagen Jetta with a Thomas The Tank Engine face grafted onto the hood? Because LeMons. A sense of humor is never far away around here.

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If you squint your eyes really, really hard this AW11 Toyota MR2 looks exactly like a Ferrari F40. Don’t see the resemblance? Squint a little harder.

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If you dig old Japanese cars, you should enjoy a LeMons event as there are plenty of them spread among the grid. One team used a beat-up KP61 Toyota Starlet for their entry.

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While another used an even older Toyota Corona sedan from the ’60s as their weapon of choice.

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Or for a completely different style of Japanese machine, check out the Mitsubishi 3000GT entered by the Empty Pocket Racing Team.

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It’s also very common see to race cars with dramatically altered bodies, like this RX-7 which has been converted into an ‘FU-HAUL’ truck.

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And while some teams put quite a bit of effort into the appearance of their LeMons cars, others look like they were literally plucked straight from the junkyard. Like this Legacy wagon that’s been transformed into a pickup truck of sorts. I love that wing on the roof!

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And speaking of the junkyard, the vibe of the pits is often more wrecking yard than it is race event. Two full days of racing is a lot of abuse for any car to take – especially ones as cheap as these. Mechanical ability and lots of teamwork are crucial for completing as many laps as possible.

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The body tells me this is a Porsche 944 but the V8 engine and the wheels suggest it’s also part Corvette. Call it a LeMons hybrid.

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Cars with motor swaps are actually quite common in the LeMons field. Take this BMW E36 for example.

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There’s no inline six under the hood. Instead you’ll find dirt-cheap carbureted V8 swap.

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Pickup trucks are also welcome to get in on the fun. Here’s the Pinewood Dirtbags’ Chevy LUV truck.

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Make no mistake, LeMons racing is a contact support and the chance of wrecking your car is always there. But a crash usually results in a quick ‘Oh damn’, before the repairs begin.

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I’ve always been someone that likes a little bit of humor and lightheartedness with my car culture, and I think that’s why I enjoyed my experience at the 24 Hours of LeMons so much. Now the next step is to find a way to get behind the wheel. Speedhunters LeMons team anyone? Who has a good suggestion for a car to use?

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Stay tuned for more from ‘Sears Pointless’, including closer looks at some of the coolest and just plain strangest budget race cars that were out there dicing it up.

Mike Garrett
Instagram: japanifornia_media
mike@speedhunters.com

Cutting Room Floor
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Comments

79 comments
SkanderFekir
SkanderFekir

that one guy had a snowboard for a wing hahahahaha yessss!

ZombieEnergy
ZombieEnergy

Loved this, but I cried a bit when I saw the FC's ;-;

Matiz
Matiz

Looks fun ,but most of these cars ,wich are common in US ,are rare in europe, hurts to watch these FCs :( 

------

but
It's nice place to mention about Złombol- charity rally, where you have to beat the distance in Eastern Bloc vehicle (for example Trabant can be known by readers). Usualy it's 2500km ,but some cars have problems to get at the starting line. Theres also some crazy themed cars, Police, FD, Ambulances, even Polonez Bella Hearse , because of gigantic baggage space :)

last year there was Czech RV van Avia nicknamed AVIATOR :)

http://m.wm.pl/2015/08/n/zlombol-261776.jpg

greenroadster
greenroadster

If I see a horse ass on the back of SH car next year at Le Mons I will start reading other sites. For real. If you choose to take part in this event, I would like to see nothing less than a sports car (2 door) and RWD. Pleaseeee

Lukelan
Lukelan

An old falcon or commodore ute, I'm definately going to enter some Aussie pride into that

JoeOlSoulR
JoeOlSoulR

If a speedhunters LeMons team happens I need in . I'm a junkyard dog of the most Visionary kind.

Lukelan
Lukelan

@MyLifeAsLouis nemo money haha!

IRONWOLF RD
IRONWOLF RD

Mike, you dirty dog, you are onto something here. A Speedhunters team (or Lemonhunters team?) would be absolutely amazing. Would definitely do a roadtrip to come on down to see that. But in any case, this kind of event just pushes all the right buttons. Something so beautifully lighthearted and downright silly, on the completely polar spectrum of Dino's recent time attack article, yet in no way any less important nor without that same thrill we petrolheads get. I can only imagine how much of a blast this event to participate in.


Also, don't let that Keith Charvonia design the car, he'll just muck it up and make it look beautiful.

jglucker
jglucker

Our Ranchero was slow and steady... until it wasn't anymore.

Paddy McGrath
Paddy McGrath

@jglucker Was just listening to the latest Hooniverse during the week, looking forward to hearing what ye got up to on the next one! 

jglucker
jglucker

@Mike Garrett we've already found another Ranchero, actually - haha - The one above is probably crusher bound once we strip it of its useful parts.


In-car video of the accident is up on Hooniverse. I don't want to spam a link here... 

Sethzilla
Sethzilla

I wish there was a better picture of the jackalope car! I helped to build the jockey sitting on top.

gagahsasono
gagahsasono

Great post Mike! Another variety in Speedhunter's posts. This is why I frequently check this website for new articles. You guys really utilize your tagline at the fullest. Hat tip to you guys!

Ikazuchi
Ikazuchi

Mike - was that you we had to kick out of our paddock space? I was with the orange JAYgermeister E30 and graffitied EF Civic. Glad you got a lovely picture of me looking at the ground for some reason :P

awesomefearwave
awesomefearwave

this is why i love living in california. car culture is the most diverse in america tbh. it's got everything. the only thing stopping me is just the emissions standards. but i can still speak my mind in my car. i love kooky things like these. i love california.

Mike Garrett
Mike Garrett moderator

@awesomefearwave I hear you. It's great here but man the emissions laws suck. That's why I love '60s and '70s cars so much.

muse_coyote
muse_coyote

@awesomefearwave  The beauty of LeMons is that it's nationwide, too. they have an event about a half hour from me, but I haven't been able to get to it.

CJC_Matty
CJC_Matty

Somewhat depressingly, a lot of these cars look to be in similar condition to my daily beater. I guess now I can convince the kids it's actually a race car.

MikeYee
MikeYee

I hope there's a spotlight coming up from one of the entrants mike

Ficarra
Ficarra

That Corona of The Supranos came in 68th place out of 148 cars! Yes, a stock, 2 speed automatic, drum brake, 46 year old Toyota running on ethanol and shod with used Chinese tires beat 80 cars. That's LeMons!

kscf31
kscf31

We run an 82 Toyota Celica in the Southeast part of this series.  It's not the fastest, but it handles amazing and we rarely break down.  Around here, the popular cars seem to be Civics, Integras, and Miatas, so one of those would be my suggestion! Great read! Thanks for doing more stories of grassroots racing!

CollinDow
CollinDow

@kscf31

I'm entering in the NW this year, and we'll either be running an '80 Fiat X1/9 or an '85 Celica GT-S.  

the_turk
the_turk

Err, blue. As long as its blue you've made a good choice.  Remember, blue.....

OLHarper
OLHarper

Find a broken down Vega that burns more oil than it burns gas. Pack a fire extinguisher for safety and you'll have a blast.

Mike Garrett
Mike Garrett moderator

@runninwild I want one sooo bad.

incomplete
incomplete

hi!  i'm one of the drivers of the FU-Haul...  if you're looking to get started, think about these things and choose accordingly:


1) fast is hard.  slow is also hard, but usually not as much.

2) simplicity is king.  build for endurance initially, not speed.

3) know whatever car you build inside and out.

4) don't pick something expected, like a BMW...  unless you swap it's engine for a slant-6:  http://blog.caranddriver.com/lemons-goodbad-idea-of-the-week-bmw-325i-with-chrysler-slant-six-power/

5) the biggest trophy is for the crappiest car that does the most laps.  the next biggest trophy is C class.  A class, with the fastest cars, gets the smallest trophy.  the FU-Haul is A, as we like running w/the big dogs.  :)


the fastest lap times (motorcycle layout) were 2:00-2:04.  our best was a 2:07 on saturday and we finished the day 13th overall.  we spent sunday trying to swap in a spare tranny we picked up from the rotary rooter guys' place.  ours sheared the input shaft on the first lap that morning.  such is lemons!  :)

yoniweb
yoniweb

I don't usually comment on articles. But when I do, it's because it was awesome and had a picture of me driving a Legacy in it. Good job Mike!

muse_coyote
muse_coyote

@yoniweb  I was about to junk my '95, but now that I've seen yours with better proportions than Subaru gave the Baja... I'm rethinking... Maybe make it a project car...

yoniweb
yoniweb

@muse_coyote @yoniweb Not really. The car is owned by Chris Overzet, and it didn't always look as beat up in it's racing career.

Dill Pickle
Dill Pickle

I bet the guy in the van was having the time of his life! It makes me want to pick up and old Dodge or Chevy fleet van and make it full dekotora meets trailer trash and race it there.

2xthefun
2xthefun

this was a quality click and read.

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